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The Whisper of His Voice
1 week ago
As of Late
Some bloggy friends of mine have inspired me to dig deep. I'm in a retrospective kind of mood and even though it's only Tuesday, I figure what the heck? Here's what I've been up to lately...
Lately I've been on my face before God-contrite, weary, and hungering for more of him.
Lately I've been having lots of fun playing with my new phone. I can play pacman now!
Lately I have decided that I need less facebook and more time in the Good Book.
Lately I have been in an enourmous amount of pain and I'm actually looking forward to surgery.
Lately I have wondered what people truly think of me and if I would even want to know the answer to that question.
Lately I have been reminded that God loves me unconditionally and that's all that really matters.
Lately I have vowed to be slower to speak and quicker to listen.
Lately I have been praying for Japan and wondering how I can help.
Lately I have been working on a new Thomas Kincade puzzle. I forgot how the simple act of putting the pieces together takes me to my happy place.
Lately I have lost weight- 5 pounds off the body, the whole world off my back. Forgiveness is a beautiful thing.
Lately I've been surrounded by sick people and have not caught anything! Vitamin C is my friend.
Lately I've been incredibly thankful for the roof over my head.
What about you? What's have you been up to lately?
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Sifting Through Ashes
In a strange way I feel a strong connection with my brothers and sisters in Japan. I've just emerged from a raging storm that has thoroughly leveled what little progress I'd made in my spiritual walk. I'm exhausted and sore from sifting through the rubble in search of something salvageable. I hear the cries in my subconcious-"You're worthless! You're such a waste!" and every day is a battle to climb out of the pit. The good news is that I am climbing out and I'm slowly starting to rebuild that which was destroyed. Amid the lies of Satan, I am yet reminded- He is still with me. I wrote this poem several years ago but I find it ironic that today I can still identify with it.
The Cross Remains
I've walked among the lilies that bloomed in spring's new birth.
I've hung my head in sorrow as I wiped away the dirt
of a few long, hard lessons traveled on unfamiliar sod.
I've cried the tears of wretched pain to a nameless, faceless God.
Of all the life I've lived 'till now and all that's still to come
I can say with perfect certainty I know that I am loved.
He speaks in silent whispers and his word is always true.
He said, "Life is hard but I am peace and I will always be with you.
I'll send my spirit in to sweep the pain of yesterday away.
When all is gone, rest well my child.
The cross will still remain.
The ashes flutter to the ground as the last spark disappears.
Now all that's left is a thick dust signaling the end of another year.
A barren wasteland covered in white remnants of the past.
I walk along still holding on the assurance of my master's plan.
Tomorrow is a mystery, could be anybody's guess.
Will all I have go up in flames or is this part of a greater test?
I'll cling with hope to the one I know who's ways are not my own.
With confidence I'll stand before him boldly at his throne.
When everything has burned to ash and there's nothing left to say,
I cannot see the road ahead but
The cross will still remain.
The past and future dance, two lovers on a summer's eve.
Never fully embracing, they drink of time's sweet melody.
They know that when the hour comes they'll finally be as one.
For now they're happy just to serve the one who created them.
For they know that time in all its seasons will someday pass away.
When all that's left is the air they breathe
The cross will still remain.
”Have no fear, I'm never far away.
When all seems lost, look up my child.
The cross still remains.”
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See You There!
Happy Saturday! I'm over at EveryChristian today so stop by and say hello!
http://www.everydaychristian.com/blogs/post/9736/
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Reaching Toward Raindrops
In my dream I was standing in the rain. The darkness of night embraced me like an old friend. The warm, wet drops came in a torrent and I was jubilant with glee. My white shirt was soaked to the skin but still, that was not enough. She came outside to join me and together we laughed and danced beneath Heaven’s praises. We were seemingly oblivious to the battle scars we had inflicted on each other. I noticed a child size swimming pool filling up with increasing speed. Together we dove in and immersed ourselves in the soothing water. We swam and played like we ourselves were children as the rain continued to pour down on us…
February 24, 2003
God and I finally made our peace. With each passing day I get stronger and I hear him a little bit better than I did before. I’m on a mission to find out exactly what he wants me to be doing with my life. I want to experience all that he has planned for me. I want to be blessed and I want to bless others with my abilities. I came out of the dark hole and now I’m ready to walk into the sunlight. My eyes are slowly adjusting to the world around me and the brighter it becomes the more I want to experience it to the fullest. I’ve been in a desert for so long and now I’m thirsty for God in every sense of the word.
I understand that I don’t have time to be angry and hold grudges. People are not going to remember me for all those that I’ve learned to forgive. They will remember me for the ways I made a positive impact in their life. The things that I was angry about before are becoming less and less important. I know I’m loved and all the things I need are right within my reach.
My biggest obstacle is myself. It’s crazy how we do that, isn’t it? God has all these blessings that are right in front of us. All we have to do is pick up our feet and start walking toward them. We make it so much harder when we take the long way around or ignore them altogether. We build these giant brick walls that stand smack in the way of our dreams. Then we get mad at God because we can’t find the very thing that we ourselves locked up and put away.
All God wants me to do is stop building and start listening for his voice. So I’ve stopped the construction. I’m ready to start seeking him out and finding all that he has waiting for me. Whatever gets in my way will be pushed aside because I don’t have time anymore. Everything ugly that I insist on embracing must be surrendered. How am I ever going to be able to hug Jesus if all I have are rocks in my arms?
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